“Women are bitter,” a man casually muttered at a social gathering, oblivious to the weight of his words. It’s a sentiment many women have heard too often, casually dismissed as emotionless critique. But the truth is not that women are bitter—we are exhausted. We are tired of navigating a society structured by patriarchy and poisoned by misogyny, where being a woman means constantly fighting to be seen as fully human.
Patriarchy and misogyny are not abstract academic ideas. They manifest in the way society treats women: in casual conversations, media portrayals, legal systems, and violent outcomes. The core issue isn’t bitterness. It’s survival.
The Normalization of Violence
In the United States, violence against women is not just prevalent—it’s normalized. From dismissive jokes to brutal assaults, violence is too often minimized or even justified. In 2018, 92% of women murdered by someone they knew were killed by men, and 63% of them by current or former intimate partners. These numbers are horrifying, but they barely scratch the surface of how deep the problem runs.
The media plays a devastating role by desensitizing society to this violence. Female characters are often portrayed as passive, submissive, or sexualized, reinforcing traditional gender roles. Men, in turn, are socialized to believe they are entitled to women’s bodies and attention. This entitlement fuels violence—physical, emotional, and sexual—and it is rarely treated as a systemic issue.
Misogyny in the Digital Age
Social media has made it easier for misogyny to spread and thrive. When high-profile abuse cases surface—like Cassie’s lawsuit against Diddy or Megan Thee Stallion’s shooting—women are immediately met with doubt, ridicule, or outright hatred. Victim-blaming is rampant. Comments like “free Tory Lanez” or “what did she do to provoke him?” show how deep the denial runs, even when the evidence is overwhelming.
This constant invalidation forces women to retreat, emotionally and socially, and when we do, we’re labeled as “bitter” or “unloving.” But women are not retreating because we don’t care. We are protecting our peace from a society that has too often betrayed our trust.
The Emotional Toll
Patriarchy also teaches men to bond through misogyny. From group chats to locker room talk, the culture of criticizing and objectifying women is pervasive. This contributes to a broader emotional disconnect where men struggle with empathy and emotional accountability. As women grow more aware and more independent, many choose to distance themselves from harmful relationships—and ironically, male loneliness increases, which sometimes fuels more aggression.
It’s a vicious cycle: men try to control women, women push back, and the response is more control, more violence, more withdrawal. And still, women are told to “choose better,” as if the burden of preventing abuse rests solely on their shoulders.
The Political Impact
Policy decisions also reflect misogynistic priorities. Under the Trump administration, crucial data about gender, sexual orientation, and public health was erased from federal surveys. This rollback didn’t just erase people’s identities; it dismantled tools used to track and address gender-based violence. Ignoring the data doesn’t make the problem go away—it only makes it easier to deny.
The rise in femicide in the US during the pandemic is a direct result of compounded misogyny and systemic neglect. Women are more than ever in need of protection, yet even their deaths are rendered invisible when the systems refuse to count them.
What Women Want Is Simple
At the core of all this is a painfully simple truth: women are asking for the bare minimum. To be respected, to be safe, to be treated as partners—not possessions. Women want relationships built on communication, empathy, and loyalty—not control, coercion, or violence.
Yet even this is seen as “too much.” When women walk away from harmful dynamics, they are punished socially, economically, and emotionally. They are called names, deemed unworthy, and blamed for their own suffering.
We are not bitter. We are tired. Tired of fighting to be seen, to be heard, to be safe.
And we will not apologize for demanding better.